Singing the Blues

What is it about music that helps me cope with the drama in my life? Is it the artist's sharing their own personal drama, or maybe the catchy tunes? I enjoy just about any type of music, especially ones I can sing along to. This same attraction though is probably the reason I read blogs and started one my own.

I value the effort of the artist's and appreciate their willingness to share their thoughts and feelings with us readers. I try my hardest to keep my readers from being bored to death with all of my drama, but the truth is I blog for myself. I created this blog about a year ago as a way to cope and complain about my daily encounters. Looking back at my archives, I see most of my problems are with men and work. Now since I obviously cant get rid of them, you my readers can either listen to the crazy drama anyway or point me (the newest addition to the singles scene) in the direction of the nearest karaoke bar.

Old People Cant Divide Fractions

It's official. I'm old. Not only do I have wrinkly hands, but now I'm the oldest person in my nursing class. Or at least the ones accepted thus far. I felt like such a dumb ass today when taking the college assessment exams. I breezed through the reading and writing sections, but when they handed my the math part I nearly had a stroke.

I suppose its best that I know how to divide and multiply decimal points and fractions by hand, but come on... fork over the damn calculator if you want an answer from me. Its been 10 years since I graduated high school and just as I told the professors there too, all that counts is the answer and not the means of finding the answer. But just like then, he didn't find it amusing. So my sorry ass will likely be in remedial math my first semester. The old lady in the corner with the wrinkly hands :(

I cant wait to see what next weeks pre-nursing assessment exam looks like. I'll show them little twerps what this old lady knows!!!

Egg Hunt Strategies = Life Lessons

I was doing some thinking today. As parents we teach our kids to do things certain ways for a reason. For instance I was having a conversation with the girls today about Easter egg hunts. I told them to ignore the eggs in the front of the field and instead run away from the large crowds that will gather for the few in front and keep focused on the many more that are in the distant. If you ignore the temptation and keep running, focused on the larger quantity at the farther end, you'll do much better overall, and chances are you'd have less children to compete with.

Now how does this relate to life? See, if your always jumping on a chance presented in front of you, your overall chances of success and satisfaction will not reach their full potential. I'm not happy with a few things in life, but unlike Britney Spears I will not call them mistakes. They were choices that I made. I wanted to be with the ex because at that moment he met my needs. I wouldn't call it a mistake, but rather another lesson learned. I've changed careers a few times, striving for a sense of self accomplishment. I thought I found it when I became an EMT, but then when I became ill and determined to learn more about my own heath problems, I decided to continue my education even further on a professional level. I'm waiting on my admission decision from Nursing School. I know I can do it. I've got plenty of people trying to discourage me, but I want to reach for those eggs in the distant. Honesty though, I cant see myself being satisfied even after graduation. I'll likely continue and take my education further possibly focusing on my BSN and then NP or PA. Who knows?

...let me stop babbling on and on though otherwise we'll miss them blowing the whistle initializing the start of the egg hunt.

Harming

Do you think its possible to love someone but not want to be with them? I find his faults, but yet still am not quite ready to say goodbye. He tells his friends and family that he wants to be with me forever, but doesn't tell me. Even if he did, I couldn't say the feeling is mutual. I enjoy having someone to say goodnight to and be with when I don't want to be alone. I found someone that I could love forever, but just cant seem to. Is it me? Is it my insecurities or am I just not ready to settle down and trust again?

I don't want to lose him, but I'd like to see what else the world has to offer. I find myself still searching the personal ads wondering just that... I don't want to feel like I'm settling. I suppose for now I'll take it day by day, I'll continue my search. Meeting some pretty interesting people along the way. As long as I'm not harming myself or anyone else, I couldn't see any fault in my actions. Could you?

Pet Food Recall

Making headlines lately is the topic of a major recall of pet food. It seems that some supplier in china sold tainted wheat gluten which was used in various pet foods. This substance is supposedly causing kidney failure especially in cats. Researchers believe to have 16 "confirmed" deaths thus far. In my opinion, the number of unconfirmed must be in the hundreds.

Just a few weeks ago, I too was a concerned cat owner dealing with a sudden onset of what appeared at first to be dehydration. Initially I wasn't too concerned, given his age, I thought it was simply his time to go. However other family members seemed to disagree. We took him to the Vet whom diagnosed him with dehydration, injected some fluids and gave us the option of either taking him home and give him some TLC or keep him overnight for fluids at a cost of $800. If I could've found a vein on a cat I'd give him the fluids myself, but I couldn't. We still opt'd to take him home. We were feeding him with a baby syringe and watching as his body was shutting down. Frustrated from watching him suffer, I stopped forcing the meal replacement down his throat. I figured, without nutrition his suffering would end sooner. He was without a doubt terminal. I couldn't stand to watch him go from waking me up bright and early in the morning and running like a child to kitchen for food, to the cat that didn't have the energy to even lift his head. Two days later the vet called to check on the cat that was befriended by so many. He offered to see him the following day for blood work, and wouldn't charge for the visit. He too was concerned for the cat that so many grew to love. Sadly though, Scooch didn't make it through the night. I remember getting the call from my distraught mother and driving him to the pet hospital at 2am in the city to be cremated.

Unfortunately without the lab work or a look at his kidney's for traces if this substance, It's virtually impossible to prove that he died as a result of ingesting this poison being traced in pet food. It was obvious that his kidneys were failing, but what caused it will always be a mystery to us.