Saturday, July 04, 2009

"...I'd Have To"

I'm back from outer space. I haven't been blogging much... I'm sorry. I just hate having to come here to complain about little stuff when there's so much worse going on around me. However by not communicating or expressing my thoughts and emotions, I finally exploded. What did it for me? A simple comment.

While having a brief conversation in the elevator with HIM, I confirmed my fear. Things really are very much different than they were last year, as was his answer in comparison to the answer he gave last year. Hearing him say that he'd have to simply disappear one day without notice made me realize that I really have been nothing more than a work related benefit for use at his disposal. And by accepting it I've cheating myself of all I truly deserve.

I reflect on many good memories between us and the many dreams we once shared and it brings tears to my eyes to think of it coming to an end, but in all reality It really ended months ago.

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