Sunday, September 20, 2009

Look into the Crystal Ball


We keep company that makes us feel good. Someone that brings out the best in us. A few years ago I met someone that helped me forget my many struggles, even if only for the brief time we spent chatting in his car. Our friendship grew stronger and stronger and we began to fully confide in one another our deepest feelings.
I soon after fell for my best friend. He was all I could think about day and night. All I ever wanted... smart, funny, a hard worker, a dreamer and most importantly a good dad to his kids. Everything I sought in a partner.
Just as fate brought us together in an instant, it tore us apart too. His son was in a horrible accident and though he survived, it left a huge psychological burdon on his protective dad. Initially we still spoke everyday though he was 1000 miles away. I knew he was struggling with the impact the accident left, but still held onto hopes that the friend I once loved would soon return. Months later, when he was still struggling, the Dr prescribed him medication. With the swallow of the pill I lost my best friend. In his place stood a man with no emotion, no passion and nothing worth smiling about anymore. Still, I held onto hope that when he returned to NYC I'd be able to help him get better. Instead things got worse.
The days turned into weeks as I wouldn't hear from him. I sent emails and messages no which I got no response. Id check his phone records for some reassurance he was alive and well, and instead I'd find he's been chatting with many other females. So why not me? We keep company that makes us happy. I suppose I stopped making him happy. Instead of confronting him, I did the same. I began chatting with guys that made me feel good as he once did.
He once told me he wished he could look into a crystal ball and see where we'd be in a few years. Never in a million years would I have imagined our relationship would've ended the way it did.

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