Sunday, March 01, 2009

The Fool

With a heart as full of love as mine, its hard to imagine the tough me on the streets of NYC. The white chick running into the bad neighborhoods when everyone's running away from the flying bullets. But that's just me... at work at least.

In my private life however I'm probably the softest of anyone you know. If I love you you'll know it. I'll admit I've made mistakes in my past, only caring about my own happiness, but I know better now. Or do I really?!

I feel like such a fool. You haven't called in weeks. You ignore my texts. You essentially are doing what I've done to others in the past. It was easier to ignore my problems than to deal with them. So you'd think I'd stop trying right?! Wrong. I stand here looking out the window hoping to see you even if just for a few seconds while you walk into the building. To know your alive and well. When my phone rings I run to it hoping its you. I lay in bed wondering if you paused for even one second to think of me.

I want so bad to go on with my life. I've never felt this way before and swore I'd never let it get to this. I'm absolutely certain I couldn't trust you with my heart. So why now does it lay in your hands?! I feel like such a fool.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I feel the same way right now..and I want so bad to move on but its so hard. Thanks for being there for me girl..I hope things work out for u..for us. We deserve much more.